From People Pleaser to Leader

How To Stop Being A People Pleaser And Start Leading With Confidence

People pleasers are often afraid to assert themselves or take risks. They worry about how others will perceive them and tend to stay in their comfort zone, instead of pushing themselves to grow and learn. Being a people pleaser means you’re not taking risks, and as a result, you end up stagnating.

But being a people pleaser isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, sometimes it’s essential to get along with others. People pleasers often have a lot of empathy and compassion, which makes them great at comforting others and soothing tensions.

However, if you want to take your career or life to the next level, you need to be more assertive and self-reliant. Being a people pleaser doesn’t mean you’re weak – it means that you’re comfortable taking care of others. But it’s important to learn how to stand up for yourself and put yourself first, no matter what the situation is.

Here are five steps you can take to start leading with confidence:

Do This to Stop Being a People Pleaser

To stop being a people pleaser, start by acknowledging that you are one. Once you know what it means to be a people pleaser, it’s easier to break the habit. Here are some tips to help:

1) Recognize you’re a people pleaser

People pleasers often try to please everyone, which can lead to them making concessions or doing things they don’t want to do. It’s difficult to identify when you’re being a people pleaser, but there are some telltale signs: you feel guilty or ashamed when you don’t please others, and you feel like your actions or words have no impact on the person or situation.

2) Know your strengths

If you know what talents YOU have that make you valuable to other people, then you’ll be able to stand up for yourself more confidently. Start by listing all the things that make YOU unique and amazing—from your intelligence to your skill set. This will help give you courage when interacting with other people, knowing that they won’t be able to dismiss or discount you simply because of who you are.

3) Set boundaries

If someone pressures or coerces you into doing something that goes against your values or beliefs, tell them firmly no thanks! You don’t owe anyone anything—not even those close to you. It’s important that you set boundaries so that those close to you know where they stand in your life, as well as yours. If someone doesn’t appreciate this boundary-setting behavior, they may not be worth your time or energy anyway!

4) Stand up for yourself when necessary

There WILL be times when it’s necessary to stand up for yourself—even if this means upsetting somebody else temporarily. Be prepared for this by arming yourself with facts (instead of assumptions), as well as solid communication skills so that everyone involved can understand each other clearly. And last but not least—never give up! Even if the situation looks insurmountable at first glance, remember that there is always hope — eventually, things will work out in your favor!

5) Be proactive instead of reactive

When something bothers us, we tend not to take necessary steps towards solving the issue because we fear potential consequences (i.e., getting rejected again). Rather than waiting until something bothers us before we do anything, be daring and come up with solutions on your own before bringing them up (or even mentioning them) directly to anyone else.

An example might be challenging someone’s ideas or assumptions in a respectful way- rather than immediately dismissing their argument as wrong, which will only escalate tensions unnecessarily. Doing so will show that you’re willing to engage with the other person constructively instead of attacking them outright, which will probably result in confrontation rather than resolution!!!

6) Take risks occasionally

One of the best ways to grow is by taking risks—both big and small — regularly. This includes trying new things, expressing your opinions freely (even if they’re unpopular), and pushing yourself beyond what’s comfortable. Doing this will help shatter any limiting beliefs or fears that might be holding you back from achieving success.

7) Find support groups/resources

If struggling with being a people pleaser is proving too difficult on its own, consider seeking support groups or resources online or in person. These groups can provide an environment where individuals can share their experiences and struggles, and can provide valuable tips and advice.

Hope these tips help! Remember, it can take time and effort to change patterns of behavior, but with patience and a little of effort, you can finally start leading with confidence!

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About Dr. Suweeyah Salih

Author and life coach helping you become your best and most authentic self.

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